Even then
by Lalacu-sama
Summary: Life experiences mold humans into fascinating beings, each and every one of them unique in the making … Yet small changes make big differences, lead to different outcomes … But even then, they'd still find their way to each other
1. Chapter 1

' _Life experiences mold humans into fascinating beings, each and every one of them unique in the making … Yet small changes make big differences, lead to different outcomes … But even then, they'd still find their way to each other '_

 **A/U: First story, first chapter…here it comes…**

 **This is my tentative exploration of life alternatives. The two main characters ( Callie and Arizona ) won't be meeting from the beginning, I want to try and take my time building the characters first, and try to make the least amount of mistakes I can ( English not being my first nor my second language :" ) !**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own any of these characters, merely the shenigans I'm making them go through.**

 **Be careful, this first chapter is an odd piece… as will the future ones I'm sure.**

 **Chapter one**

Water was all she could see around her. From one side to the other, the limitless mass seemed to stretch on to no end, living no place free. The deep azure color of the never ending ocean, everywhere, water that could swallow you whole if it chose to, or hold you in an unbelievably soft embrace. An unyielding force of nature the young golden haired girl standing on deck found mesmerizing, beautiful but cold all the same.

She felt anxious and spent, both feelings that didn't help with her inner turmoil or the scary foreboding wrecking havoc in her gut.

' _I hate boats, I hate the fact that we move so often, and god, I hate my father's job so much '_

She didn't know when nor how but with her father's constant moving she had found herself becoming more isolated, less friendly, a younger annoying brother her only solace. Some would even say she was a depressive person, but they knew nothing. How was she supposed to feel when she always was the new kid, the one that never fit in and had to stomach months of countless bullying and acclimatization just so she could leave again for another place, to point zero all over? Or when the feeling of patriotic pride her father wanted her to feel seemed to waver between relieving and loathing, or when her anxiousness level rose to impossible heights? Well, she usually dealt with her emotions with more thinking, _brooding_ , as her brother dubbed it. Drawing conclusions and mapping out similarities were her go to go activities, and that was what she was about to get into.

They were in the middle of an ocean, and none of them really asked for this. The journey was lengthy and not everyone was enjoying it the same, some were probably going to perish before the end, some were going to suffer more than others will,

' _Exactly what you'd expect from a military ship '_

They were on an unknown ride… exactly like life was, is and always will be. What was ahead of them? What was ahead of life? Would she be able to survive and make something of herself, her a meager girl with no particular talent? Thousands upon thousands of thoughts swirled in her mind, questions and insecurities roamed through her head, eating away at her and so engrossed in her thoughts, she never heard the person approaching her from behind until she felt a hand on her left shoulder. The blond shrieked while jumping slightly from the surprise touch, letting out small breaths to even her quickened heart rate. Her brother, who else could it be than her little brother.

-"Staring isn't going to make the land appear out of nowhere Sis, you know that right?" He chuckled at her expanse. If life was this unknown ride they were on, then the lands would certainly mean and represent their discoveries about it, their progress as human beings and at some point, the end for them, _death_. A tap to the head abruptly stopped her brooding.

-"Ow, what was that for?" She grumbled.

-"You were thinking too much…again, I could hear the sound of your brain cells going on fire," A cheeky smile spread across his face, "And why are you up so early anyway ?"

The older sister gave him a pointed look as well as a small slap to his shoulder, blue eyes met green in a challenge, both locked on a stare down. Holding her serious face in front of him when he was in such a playful mood had always been hard and for a few seconds she did, then a small smile hastily turning into a full blown laugh tore from her mouth and her silly brother soon joined her in her morning madness. They both didn't really get why they were both laughing but they didn't care, laughter lightened both of their moods.

Few moments later, a comfortable silence settled between in them.

-"Mum actually sent me to get you,"

-"Breakfast?"

-"Yep…" he confirmed.

-"And why did you take this much to tell me? " she asked, her voice flat.

"Hum …you know, I was about to blow you up and gulp down every treat Mum made" she looked at him, right eyebrow arched, " Then I saw you all sad and mopey…you know I can't help that puppy look Sis !" he let out a yelp when he received his sister's playful slap.

-"Hey- … what was that for ?"

-"Idiot! " She couldn't help but smile.

-"You know you love me." He smirked at her arrogantly, and she _did love him, so much._

-"… Sometimes I wonder why… " She deadpanned at him.

-"Well I can see why, I am all kind of awesome!" She shook her head at his antics, a fond smile adorning her cheeks.

-"Am I spotting a smile on your face Sis? Oh my god…. She smiles" she shot him a nasty look annoyed, "Ah… I knew that it was fleeting, you know you'll be nicknamed Mcgrumpy if you keep this up" He jabbed again as she rolled her eyes at him, _typical annoying behavior._

-"We're going or what? I'm calling dibs on the cinnamon rolls" she'd started turning around then stopped when she saw her brother rooted in his spot, unmoving.

' _Yeah, the only thing that changes is where we live'_ She couldn't help adding as an afterthought, before quickly shaking her head, soft blond curls blowing left to right.

Calmness once again settled in as the older sibling let out a sigh, realizing that for now, worrying about the future was not going to help nor change anything.

-"The ocean is beautiful isn't it? " Her brother supplied, his eyes on the clear waters in front of them. Eyes flickering from his green orbs face then back to the deep azure depths, she let out a sigh. Free of those silly thoughts that had been plaguing her earlier, with the gentle morning breeze on her face, the soothing sound of crashing waves and her brother's presence by her side she couldn't find the scene anything else than comforting.

-"Yes, it is" She softly whispered.

She was content, she had loving parents and an annoying sweet brother, the best she could ever hope for and even though they were constantly on the move because of her father's military career, her family always brought her _immeasurable joy and untold happiness._

' _What else could I be asking for? "_

* * *

A/N: _First story, first chapter done! Maybe you've figured out what route I'm going with?_

 _Yep I'm taking a trip down memory lane, searching for how's, where's, when's and why's those two girls became what they became… with a healthy dose of originality of course: 3 !_

Though keep in mind that this story is an AU and will at some point derivate from the main story line, actually … SPOILERS… by the time they'll be meeting Arizona and Callie will be so much different you'll wonder how… okay not that much, I was trying to be funny ;3 !

 _PS: In case some people do like this, I'm already apologizing for you for my future tardiness in updating, (stress and studying + general lack of time) being the problem. Thank you._


	2. Chapter 2

_Summary_ _: ' Life experiences mold humans into fascinating beings, each and every one of them unique in the making … Yet small changes make big differences, lead to different outcomes … But even then, they'd still find their way to each other '_

 **A/U: First story, second chapter…here it comes…**

 **I hope you'll enjoy reading this one as much as I enjoyed writing it…while I was supposed to be studying really… and that the unusual start and its follow ups won't put you off too much ;" !**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own any of these characters, or sentences or anything seen elsewhere. Those belong to their creators.**

 **Chapter** **Two**

' _I'm losing my freaking mind '_

She pounded her pillow for the millionth time, trying to get comfortable. It still didn't work. Huffing, she got up, went to get a glass of water, ' _or whatever the hell I can find'._ She raided the fridge and yet she still couldn't find anything interesting enough to munch on. Sometimes Jose, their chef was too good at his job, and with that reminder she knew nothing could be done. Her parents weren't even a possibility for her to get help from, especially at three in the morning. She bit her lower lip uncertainly.

' _Dare I ? '_ Her stomach churned and she knew she had no choice.

The house was dark, the moonlight providing some illumination as she walked familiar passageways. She stopped outside her final "door" destination and listened. Complete utter silence.

It was a cool evening and she was barefoot in cotton pajama bottoms and a tank. She shivered a little, sorry now she hadn't taken the time to grab a wrap or at least put on a pair of shoes. She knocked softly, scowling when the sound echoed. This is insane. Her resolve strengthened. She turned the door knob and pushed the door open. It was pitch black.

' _What am I doing ? '_

-"Roberto ? " She called out, her voice so low she wasn't sure she'd said anything out loud.

' _Louder, stupid… '_

"Roberto ?" She heard some rustling and then he appeared in front of her.

-"Is there a problem Calliope ?" He rasped out sleepy, chocolate eyes scanning her body for any injury.

-"No, no I- just-… you know I get stomach ache when I'm stressed out and-" She rambled, she felt stupid and childish.

Strong hands grabbed her by her shoulders and guided her to the queen sized bed in the room. A click signaled that the door was closed. Turning a bedside lamp on, Roberto sat in front of her, took her hands in his bigger ones gently, his eyes meeting hers as the room now brightened with a yellowish glow.

She felt a blush creep up her cheeks. One minute she was standing on the hallway, two seconds later she was sitting on his mattress, sheets in disarray, with her hands clasped in her school girl's crush with his face barely inches away from hers. A face etched with such concern she felt a stab of guilt in the pit of her stomach.

Throughout her early childhood, this man was the one she went to when she was hungry, hurt or had any problem…everything. He took such care of her in a house where her parents were barely present and where the staff was always renewed, but Roberto wasn't. He'd always been _there,_ managing everything, a special kind of butler… _One hell of a butler…_ and now, in her awkward socially inept teenage life she developed a crush the size of the Himalaya on him. Late thirties, born from a Cuban mother and an American father, Roberto had drawn the 'good' short stick and inherited all their good genes with his flawless features. He was tall with wavy brown hair, a strong jaw and soulful chocolate eyes.

' _And shirtless at the moment,'_

-"You don't seem to be physically injured, so tell me … what's bothering my favorite girl ?" He squeezed her hand and smiled warmly at her. She blushed at his words, _Smooth talker too,_ but as quickly as she registered his question she frowned.

-"I'm tired Roberto, why are my parents never here when they're supposed to ? I mean yeah they're working, but…. We're so-…lonely" She briefly stopped her rant, eyes wide " I…not lonely because you're here obviously but, it's only you and…" She was babbling, her words making no sense but she couldn't seem to stop herself. She'd always lost control of her mouth when frustrated or anxious and now she just felt stupid and needy.

-"Go on !" He nudged her, an encouraging look on his face, "Keep going." And going on she did.

-"Aria… She told me something last night " She hesitantly drew closer to him, unconsciously asking for comfort he didn't hesitate to give as he brought one of his hands around her.

-"She told me that… She didn't care if mom and dad were home or not and that she didn't need them because they might as well not be her parents," Her eyes stung, her little sister was sad and lonely and she could do nothing to help ease her suffering.

-Shh, let it out" His tight embrace was it, Callie broke down in sobs.

-"She is young…" Roberto's voice was gentle, calm and confident, a confidence she was in desperate need of, " and so are you Calliope, things will look up, your parents are working so much for you so you could have this kind of life, okay ? They may not show it well but they love you both very much… don't you ever question that" he looked down at her, and she met his gaze, glaring at him.

-"They're never here, Aria is right, parents are supposed to care for you no matter what, they're supposed to teach you and help you through life! When are they going to realize that all of this," She gestured to the lavishly decorated room," Isn't what truly matters ?" Callie's voice broke once again at the end of her speech and she found herself between strong arms, yet again.

-"You see ? They did teach you something,"

-"What ?" She mumbled into his shoulder.

-"They taught you one of the most important lessons you could ever learn from life, money doesn't make happiness." He smiled, "And you know what would take your mind off from this ?" She looked at him then. His rumpled hair, his eyes… his-

-"Calliope ? "

-"Yeah?" She answered, her voice small, his words halting her hazy teenage thoughts, _'and hormones'_. He stared at her for a moment then a smile curved his lips. He rose from bed and walked over to his closet, quickly shrugging into a black V-neck sweater. He gestured to his bed.

-"Get in. I'll be back in a minute" The young Latina blinked confused by the whole ordeal.

-"What ? Where are you going?" He raised his eyebrow at her hesitant voice.

-"I have a craving" he smirked.

* * *

-"Oh my god, this is so good." She gave a loud moan and squeezed her eyes shut, savoring the sweet treat… a gigantic tub of vanilla ice cream.

' _Her favorite'_

-"I can see that" He sounded amused, "Are you going to tell me about your other problem now, I recall a complaint about stomach ache."

She shoveled another spoonful into her mouth.

-"A test, nothing else really…"

-"Yeah ? You sure?" he asked unconvinced, his eyes boring into hers. She never really could keep something to herself, she had no filter, especially with this man.

-"It's this guy from chemistry, there's this party and he invited me to it and…"

-"You're afraid to go …" He ventured.

-"Yes," She nodded, eyes on the ground.

-"Then you shouldn't, or better yet, let yourself feel everything, not just your fear but everything. Love unconditionally Calliope, there's nothing better than a person who owns her emotions," She smiled at him, Roberto was her favorite person. He shoved her playfully out of his bed.

-"Now go back to sleep sweetheart, I'm tired and unlike you I didn't stuff myself with sugar to cope with the fatigue."

That night, Calliope Iphigenia Torres slept soundlessly in her bed, thoughts about her fear of rejection and frustration at her parent's absence, miles away from her. Roberto had elevated her feelings but at the same time, unknowingly, helped turn her into the kind of person that wore their heart on their sleeves. The very next day, she would despite her fear present herself at that famous party she'd dreaded for weeks and where she would find out that her 'chemistry date' had stood her up, thus marking the beginning of what she would much later on in her life come to refer to as " The cursed Torres love life ".

* * *

A/N: _First story, second chapter done! I am having so much fun writing out past memories, small meaningful moments in Arizona's and Callie's life. Things don't seem much different at the moment and for now that's okay .I'll try posting the next one as quickly as I can… I make no promises : 3 !_


	3. Chapter 3

_Summary_ _: ' Life experiences mold humans into fascinating beings, each and every one of them unique in the making … Yet small changes make big differences, lead to different outcomes … But even then, they'd still find their way to each other '_

 **A/U: First story, third chapter…**

 **This chapter was a little hard to write and I'm not quite satisfied with how it turned out but it'll hopefully have to do. I wanted to get it over with because I won't be having much time for posting like I did for the first two chapters.**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own any of these characters, or sentences or anything seen elsewhere. Those, belong to their creators.**

 **Chapter Three**

Pain, pain was all she felt at the moment, a pain just as intense as the one that made her cry in the backseat of her father's car while he was driving her to the nearest hospital, and an hour later, seated in the hospital lobby and waiting for her leg's scan with all these sick people around here, she felt ashamed. On her way here, her swollen leg had garnered her more pitying stares than she'd ever received in her whole life, how ? She was in a freaking hospital with a probably fractured leg and a bruised ego but that was it really. People were dying in gruesome ways while she was comfortably waiting for her scan's and people were pitying her ? A half dead man was screaming a few meters away from her for god's sake, with more than half of the skin covering his torso missing, leaving exposed raw flesh for everyone to see.

' _Screaming !'_

She couldn't help her confusion and horror, he was screaming and people thought she had it bad ? Was it her tear stained cheeks that did the trick, or her slightly reddened eyes maybe ? She shook her head. The pain this man had to be feeling had nothing to do with hers. Sure her leg looked as if someone had decided to turn it into a balloon with how swollen it looked and the multi colored marks littering it from mid calf down made it dangerous looking, but it was ultimately nothing time and good routine wouldn't fix, but that man …all that missing skin, the weird blobs that pointed to a possible infection and the scaring not to mention the emotional trauma.

' _God, ripped off skin'_ She repeated in her mind, an incredulous look still plastered on her face.

The blond haired girl cursed her low pain tolerance and her childish reaction to something as mundane as a broken leg and not a moment later, a loud sigh she attributed to the automatic doors was heard, loud and clear.

Then it came, the sound that ushers in the madness of the outside world. Loud voices were talking fast. Urgent commands were ricocheting off the walls all around her.

A group of paramedics came hurriedly in, wheeling two gurneys into the mess of the ER, the almost quiet graveyard turning into something out of a crowded saloon in the mid-west. They momentarily stopped when a tall man dressed in scrubs came running to meet them. She could scarcely hear what they were talking about, rushed up voices made up of too many people talking at the same time, words punctuated with bleeps and shuffles and blood. A paramedic climbed on one of the beds, straddling the patient and administrating chest compressions.

-"Dr Lawson ?" the scrub clad man turned his head at the sound of his name and quickly made his way to the second patient.

-"Take the father to the OR, you page Dr Tyrell, it's a thoracic injury" He barked, pointing to a young paramedic.

-"I'll take this one" He added. In a second, they were all gone, leaving the doctor to the remaining gurney.

-"What do we have ?"

Arizona didn't hear the answer even though she saw the paramedic's lips in motion, the sight a few feet away from her sending her into shock. A small boy lay on that gurney and she didn't need to be a certified doctor to know that… This case was more than critical.

-" –Head injury, "

' _Head injury ?'_ She could see inside this kid's skull. Her heart jolts in her chest, bill rising up her throat, she wanted to throw up.

-"White male, approximately 12, injury to the back of his skull and right shoulder both received from a car accident, he was with his father."

She watched the doctor take a quick asserting look, bark more orders and wheel the boy away to some other OR where they'd try to save his life.

'Twelve years old ?' Arizona felt beat down, what kind of job was this ? people always hurting, dying on your watch… This was no workplace, this was a war zone. She probably just witnessed a family being torn down. She felt so miserable she didn't see 'ripped off skin' being wheeled away. Madness, chaos, blood and death…so much death.

-"Are you okay ?" Her eyes snapped at the question, immediately meeting her father's eyes.

-"Why are you crying? Does it still hurt you ?" He asked her, inching closer to her.

-"Crying-…?" _She was,_ she could now feel the moisture in her eyes. "No dad, I'm not hurt, I'm perfect really" …compared to what she just saw ? who wouldn't ?

-"Why then ?" He urged her in that special way of his, gentle and commanding both rolled into one, a father always knew when his daughter felt bad. She looked up at him, tiredly.

-"It's this place…I don't-, how can we work willingly here, having to deal with this on a regular basis, it seems so awful and emotionally draining and-" A finger came to her lips, giving an end to her rant.

-"Arizona," She perked up, her father was her idol, he was always understanding and loving with her and their relationship had grown so much since her early teenage years when she felt so resentful of him.

-"This is an everyday occurrence" He started, " yesterday and the day before that, things are always bad, this is a constant and yes it is hard to deal with the reality of it… and not everyone can, but there are some… and doctors ? they certainly do, they have to…it's their job." Bringing up his hand to brush away the remaining tears from his daughter's face he continued, "They vowed to suffer with the dead and do everything in their capacity to offer joy, and when they do ? Well, it keeps them going."

-"How can you say that ? They'll fail someday, everyone does and…" She half screamed emotionally, stepping forcefully away from him as her breath became ragged. The colonel, but just a worried father eager to provide comfort for his little girl at the moment, took a step in her direction and brought her into his embrace with his left hand, and started stroking her cheek with his right.

-"The best way to not feel helpless is to get up and do something, if you're met with success then good someone gets to walk out to a life full of opportunities, if you're not, you turn and find someone else to help, you don't wait for good things to happen to you baby girl," tightening his arms around her, he whispered, "you make good things happen, you'll fill the world with hope and you'll fill yourself with hope." She hesitantly maneuvered her head up and asked softly, her whole demeanor changed… subdued now.

-"Was it the same for you dad… in the marines ?"

-"Yes, it was little girl."

* * *

Two hours later, with a leg in a sling and a bag full of medicine, Arizona quietly waited for her father, her blue eyes wandering to the now illuminated door leading to the trauma ER.

Everything was so calm here and she realized now that she never really took the time to actually 'hear' how calm the streets were outside of a hospital. She closed her eyes and leaned on a nearby post. Today she fell and broke a leg, today she watched death and despair at work in front of her and stepped out of some pipe rainbow life, not that she was _that_ naïve before. She just… wanted to be honorable like her dad, to be useful and make a difference. It wasn't easy she knew, and not everyone could but she wanted-no needed to do her bit.

She'd heard on her way out about a boy with an open skull who miraculously survived his surgery, she had seen the man with the shredded torso hug his wife, albeit carefully.

Today Arizona Robbins left the hospital a completely different person.

-"Little girl ?" Opening her eyes, she spotted her father, took small careful steps and climbed into their car.

-"Dad ?" He hummed at her distracted, "I've decided to go to med school." Eyes wide, Colonel Daniel Robbins of the United States of America turned his head from the road and met his daughter's. He was met with a sight that would fill him with pride the rest of his life.

Clear blue eyes burning with determination, unflinching and unyielding. His cute little girl, a woman now, was no longer playing. She was going to be more than the good girl she had always been.

-"You are ?" He smiled at her.

-"I am" She reciprocated.

 _Today Arizona Robbins had done something unique, her, the good girl, had finally stepped into the storm._

* * *

A/N: _I just realized that in all my chapters, one of the girls was always either crying or brooding… Funny :3 !_ Anyway… _First story, third chapter done, is it okay ?_

 _It's getting harder for me to find time to post at the rate I started with and my chapters are still so small… Working on it of course, but the speed posting ? Sorry about that : / !_


	4. Chapter 4

A/N : _When I made Roberto be somewhat important to Callie's life, I never planned on him ever reappearing again… But he does here…._

 _I feel like there is too much gloom and doom in these chapters but I don't know how to make them less heavy :/_ , _Anyway here It is. First story, Chapter four !_

 **Disclaimer : I don't own any of these characters… Enjoy !**

 **Chapter four**

 _Loud sounds could be heard as she climbed the unfinishing steps, the more she did, louder the sounds became._

 _She could feel her heart beat picking up, going up to its peek just as she finally arrived to her destination. Her palms were swetty, her breathing ragged and laboured. Her glassy eyes swept around the growing crowd in front of her and where boys and girls her age were jostled against each cast a sideways glance at a group of friends to her right, those didn't seem to display the same excitement, they were in no hurry it seemed._

' _How could they not ?'_

 _That list just a few feet away from them was going to determine their future, or maybe SHE was the odd one, what parent made success in an exam the condition to allow something for their kid anyway ?_

 _Okay, a lot of them did but still…buisness school, her ? really ?_

 _Her father had been clear, he wanted her to take over the family buisness and as such he had his hopes all pinned on her, her who only wanted to go to Africa and help African people._

 _Loud laughter erupted from the small unknowing band of friends. Averting her gaze from them, the brunete slowly started walking to her goal, her momenarly forgotten anxiety coming back full force. Making her way through he thick mass was no small task but she managed eventually._

 _The background sounds lessened, Callie was completely out of her depth now, this was it, would she finally get her ticket to Bostwana ? her eyes roamed hungrily across the list in front of her, they scanned quickly and efficiently through hundred of names, one, two, three times over and by the third time her previously super eyesight began to dim, their fuel lowering as her hope began to waver._

' _It's not possible' She hopelessly thought,"I have to be on his list'_

 _Her vision became blurry, tears at the brim of her eyes. She hastily composed herself and left the place just as fast._

 _She walked and walked, never looking back, her mind free of any thought, animated by a single instinct, walk away, run and don't stop…_

 _Finally in her car, she allowed herself to think about what just happened._

 _-"I failed."_

 _The tears were freely flowing down her face. 'I couldn't do it'_

 _She opened her mouth to let out a sob but nothing came. Her heart plummeted into her stomach and a lump grew in her throat as she felt her last piece of hope crumble. Her movements were jerky, slow and uncoordinated._

 _She closed her red, puffy eyes and leaned against her seat. She let out a long heartbreaking sigh… She had a family to inform and a father to disappoint._

* * *

Stepping ou of the airport, suitcase and bags in hand, Callie started walking to the parking alley where her sister was waiting for her so they could go home.

Aria had called her a few days ago and begged her to come home from wherever she was at the moment for some emergency Callie was still privy to.

It had been two years since she last saw any of her family members. That stupid exam she missed costing her 'her' place in the peacecorps, she had made the decision to travel around and see what the world had to offer. It turned out to be one of the best things she'd ever done.

She had met bazillions of people from all around he world, explored and discovered herself in ways she would never have done home and now she was back, rich with experiences and higher maturity,

' _Coming out to my parents on the phone aside of course'_ she couldn't help but remember, it was some time during the previous year, she called her parents while tipsy and blurted out her new found bisexuality.

She spotted a taller more beautiful version of her sister Aria by their car and made her way to her. They embraced each other then the younger Torres declared her tone somber,

-"Callie, it's about Roberto… He's not-…well."

* * *

Callie looked over the starry sky, hoping to see the light, the faint, assuring glow of the full moon, the limitless expanse of the midnight color streaks covering the sky. But she could see nothing, but dark, deep, terror threatening to pierce her heart.

Terror she'd been feeling since Aria picked her up at the airport and told her why she called her in the first place.

She slumped a lazy hand over the hospital wall. She couldn't sleep. A thin, wispy breath of the deep night escaped her unmoving lips.

No one expected it.

Roberto was powerful. He was strong – he was everything that _WASN'T_ weak.

But there he was. Lying on his deathbed four months after he had been struck with a devastating disease that was making him deteriorate from the inside out.

He couldn't even make his own heart beat as it should anymore.

This was how she found him. This was what Callie came home to after her two year-long sabbatical – to find one of her most precious person resting in a white hospital bed, a device wrapped around his chest that sent electrical shocks through his body to his heart – forcing his heart to beat.

Forcing him to stay alive.

All of the best medical staff they consulted said there was no way he could survive. Even with the shocks – the life-support machine – the medicine – his heart would eventually give out on its own. He was expected to die any day now – it was just a matter of waiting and seeing.

And no amount of praying or money or shocks or hope could change that.

His eyes were closed when she entered his room. They were open now.

His voice was ragged and weak, but it was STILL the voice Callie remembered – the voice she loved.

"Hey Calliope," he breathed weakly. "Not what you expected to come back to, huh?"

Callie fought down tears and went to the other's side, sitting down next to him and reaching down, grasping his weak, frail hand in hers.

"No," she breathed. "It wasn't. How did this happen?"

"No one is sure," he replied after a moment. "They think it's something in my blood– something that runs in my family – but no one has any records of it."

"So…" she couldn't talk – couldn't breathe. "There's no cure ?" Her question was met with silence.

They both knew the answer anyway.

"This is what's best. God wanted this."

Brown's eyes turned dark and she looked away.

"God…" she muttered bitterly. "What god? If there was a god, He would NEVER allow this to happen!"

-"Don't say that, Calliope. People die, that's just the way life is. It's a cycle. In order for there to be life, there has to be death. In order for there to be good, there must be evil. There's no way around it." And here she found herself in her childhood all over again, him comforting her about her pain, exept now HE was he reason she was pained.

-"Why does it have to be YOU?" She choked out.

-"Why doesn't it have to be me?" Callie's eyes widened.

-"I'm sure He has a reason,Calliope. A reason neither you nor I could comprehend – but a reason nonetheless. Have faith." He coninued weekly.

-"Faith?" She snapped. "How can I have faith? He GAVE you this disease! He's making you DIE!"

-"He made you a member of the Torres family. He gave you good parents. He made them so they could hire me to take care of you and your sister. He made you meet all those wonderful people, he made you determined and courageous enough to bounce back from that failed trip to Africa. He made you leave so you could find yourself." He answered passionately, his chest heaving from the effort.

The young woman bowed her head and squeezed her eyes shut. Of course she had faith and believe in god, she grew up religious… But it was so hard accepting … _This_. Tears were leaking out of Callie's eyes now.

-"I would give it all away to find a way to save you."

-"No you wouldn't." He answered firmly.

-"You would never sacrifice another person to save me. You would sacrifice yourself – without question – but never another. You know that. Your heart is too big for that."

-" You shouldn't have to die …" she muttered. " This just isn't fair."

-"I know…"

* * *

The broad smile that She had on her face wasn't enough to show exactly how happy she was at the moment, how relieved and light she felt as I walked down the street.

The maximum grade.

Callie's smile became even bigger and a couple of people on the sidewalk looked at her funny, but she didn't care.

It was just noon and the day was as beautiful as the previous one; the Miami sky was incredibly clear, a bright blue with not a cloud in he horizon.

The illumination was perfect and when she finally arrived at her desired location,

 _Miami's main park,_ she sat on one of the many benches and closed her eyes, letting the fresh air fill her lungs.

She was well on her way to the medical field. Her, Callie Torres was making good on her promise and she was going to become one hell of a Doctor.

' _I'll help prevent as many deaths as I can Roberto…'_

* * *

A/N : _I'd be lying if I said I didn't contemplate making Callie something other than a doctor but I ultimatly decided against yep, Calliope Torres, M.D in here too !_


	5. Chapter 5

A/N : I had this chapter written before the fourth for reasons beyond me…

 **Disclaimer : None of these characters belong to me and I make no profit from this… baring the pleasure writing gives me. Enjoy !**

 **Chapter five**

Arizona lay in bed, eyes wide open as she watched the rays of sunlight peaking through the slats of her blinds. She didn't get any sleep the night before.

She rolled onto her back and stared up at the ceiling, watching the light creep across it. Just as the tension left her body and her blue eyes started to slide closed, her bed suddenly dipped and she felt the body of her girlfri- _ex girlfriend_ now shaking her out of her dozing.

Resisting the urge to sigh at the interruption, she cracked an eye open and looked at her .

-"Tell me more about it Arizona," The raven haired, green eyed woman asked, her voice cold. Her hands jerking Arizona to wake her up.

-"You owe it to me, it's the least you could do after…" The woman's previous frigid voice cracked.

-" Cheryl… I- " Arizona barely started before Cheryl interrupted her.

-"Please… I need to hear you say it…" The now sobbing women begged. Arizona let out a short tired sigh and looked at the suffering person, _because of me,_ in front of her, blue eyes hooded and full of shame.

-"Okay…I- Okay" She averted her head from Cheryl, because she'd never be able to share her 'night' if she didn't and started her tale… slowly, remorsfully.

* * *

The sound of fast-paced dance music was muffled by a pair of tightly closed double doors. Arizona Robbins, a regular of the bar/dance club simply walked past the bouncer with a nod and entered, much to the dismay of the twenty-odd people waiting in a line.

As soon as she entered, a wave of loud yet tantalizing music hit her, urging her to merge with the crowd inside and lose herself in the beat. _The party was lit. Flashing neon lights spinning around, making the sweaty bodies glow._

 _Making her way to the bar and quickly ordering herself a drink, she started scanning the crowd for the heck of it. She downed her glass and quickly asked the bartender for another._

 _Tonight was_ _her_ _night and it was all about celebrating, people didn't get accepted into one of the most prestigious medical programs everyday, and her,_ _Arizona frikkin' Robbins_ _had done it. John Hopkins was awaiting for her with a workload bigger than anything she'd seen before she was sure of it, but now ? Relaxing and having fun was all she could think about._

'But before I can start having fun,' She thought, 'I'll need to find someone to dance with.' Getting up from her seat she made her way through the hordes of people crowding the dance floor, drinks still being consumed one after the other, smiling and giving quick waves to friends she got to know after the months worth of weekends spent here. Her blue eyes quickly looking around.

 _Out of the sudden, she whipped her head in a direction_ , having the strangest feeling of being watched, as if each of her movements was being scrutinized, she stopped dead on when blue met brown.

'Who… Who is that?'

The girl she saw had both dirty blonde hair and brown eyes, and she almost immediately was the sole focus of her attention. She was moving gracefully with the continuous beat of the song, but what was the most disconcerting were her eyes. Deep brown eyes brimming with lust.

' _For me'_ Arizona couldn't help but think, because yes even though surrounded by both men and women, the sandy blond dancer had her eyes trained on her… and only _her_. She looked like she was dancing sorely for Arizona's enjoyment and she would lie if she said that she wasn't smitten within moments.

'But who is she?' she thought about going over and talking to her, but decided against it when the image of a raven haired girl flashed into her mind. That, coupled with that armada waiting to get a piece of her and whom she didn't seem to notice, really….

' _Because she is frikking looking at me'_ Arizona was rooted on her spot, she was dazed, maybe her alcohol intake was a lot higher than she thought it was and was thus responsible for both the buzz in her head and the aching heat gathering in her core ? She didn't know, so she kept her position and watched; watched as the men were shrugged off one by one, and watched as a path seemed to open up in the crowd, almost as if the people were urging her to make a move on the woman who still had her smoldering eyes on her.

She didn't, and despite her earlier mental freak out she would never.

Suddenly the object of her thoughts stopped dancing and started walking over to her. The previously open path for her, now _hers._

As she approached, Arizona's head became lighter; not as if she were about to fall unconscious, but as if she were going to combust, but she kept a straight face as best as she could.

'Why the hell did I think that coming here on my own would be a good idea again ? Yeah… because Cheryl was being selfish, how can my girlfriend not be happy for me when I receive such good news ?

' because it's Hopkins and Hopkins was in another state all together,' a distant voice in her head supplied, a voice muffled by the loud music and her glaring headache.

'I'm not-… I can't do this…' Suddenly though, she had a surge of madness.

'Hm…' Her steps echoed in her ears as she proceeded to walk to the other woman who was inching closer to her too, a dangerous smirk plastered on her lips.

Reaching out her hand, Arizona gave her a smile and after a brief moment where her buzzing mind seemed to shut down, her homologue returned her smile and grabbed her hand. "My name's Lauren," she said, smile morphing into smirk she added, "Yours?"

-"Arizona"

-"Well Arizona," gesturing to the exist door wih her head, "Would you like to go somewhere else ?"

They stared at each other for a few more moments, Arizona holding her breath until she realized that she was standing there, waiting for this woman to make a move, to kiss her. She let out a sigh, took in a new set of air and took a step back.

 _Damn it,_ _She cursed her inebriated state, her reckless excitement from the earlier night and her stubborness to come even though she knew she'd be on her own._

Her head shot up, eyes wide, surprised to feel the warmth of Lauren's skin so close to hers.

Lauren Boswell was the easiest woman one can find, she was beautiful, smart and selfish enough to use both her assets when needed. When she wanted something, she took it and tonight, this gorgeous blond was all she wanted. Her fingers slid under Arizona's palm, fighting to intertwine their hands. She wasn't responding, but that didn't stop her. In fact, it only made her that much more desperate to get a reaction out of the blue eyed beauty that didn't exactly open up for her, but that didn't resist either.

Arizona's chest rose and fell a little faster as she fought to breathe, their eyes connecting as she fought for control, and just as she was about to snap, just as she was about to give in, her brain caught up to what was going to happen and she disappeared through the mass of people and out through the nearest exist.

Lauren didn't even sigh. It took her only a moment to decide to follow after her, she wasn't the kind to give up and fail, especially _now._

Arizona was leaning against a vending machine, her back was to the backdoor of the club, her breathing was ragged, she was dizzy and she was so drunk now she wanted to empty all of her stomach's content.

The clarity of mind she hoped for, unfortunatly didn't come because she felt Lauren boswell's echoing steps behind her.

-"Don't." she practically begged, she couldn't do this to Cheryl, yes she was mad at her but… She could feel brown eyes boring into her from behind.

-"Why not Arizona?" No, no she wouldn't… couldn't

' _It's already over between you anyway… '_

\- "You're allowed to lose control too" She huskily added.

Arizona slowly brought her left hand to her pounding head. She briefly thought of running away again, but then she was spinning around and moving quickly into Lauren's form, hands coming around her neck in seconds as she brought her down and …

* * *

CLACK

The door to Arizona's room slammed hard, a deafening note of finality that rang through the air, echoing over and over her betrayal.

Cheryl was a very mature girl that never indulged in petty gestures, a trait Arizona had always appreciated in her, but tonight she hated it because she knew she deserved whatever her ex-girlfriend threw at her.

They had been close to each other in a comforting way. It wasn't love, despite the fact that Cheryl reffered to it as such- but it was good, and she _wrecked it_.

' _And for what , a quick lay ?"_ Arizonacursed herself silently; she would have all of Cheryl's anger and more, if it could ease the pain she caused her in any way, but she knew that that was impossible.

She wondered if it would ease her guilt at all, to try and make her understand and express how much she regreted that night, how sorry she felt- but there were some things that just couldn't be put into words.

Cheryl was gone, gone to a place where she wouldn't hurt her anymore, where she'll find someone to love her as she deserved and not destroy her as she did.

As for her, she would pack her belongings some time in the following week and depart to Baltimore where a new chapter of her life was awaiting for her.

 _Cheating was never an act she saw herself commiting, but she did. She had gone against her basest principle of helping whomever needed it and hurt Cheryl…_

As she closed the door to what was now an empty apartment, suitcases stuffed with her belongings, Arizona vowed to never make the same mistake again.

 _She'd never stoop so low again, of that she promised herself._

* * *

 **A/N : Fifth chapter over ! I always felt that Lauren was an intresting character… nahh :3, anyway it was very hard for me to write this chapter, who finds 'cheating related stuff' easy to write anyway ? I still hope it turned out okay.**

' **til next time !**


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